Tag Archives: shame

Judgement is a killer!

For me, letting go of judgement resulted in  a huge change in how I feel healthwise and in general.

For years I’ve used the example of garlic – some love it and some hate it.  What people feel about garlic doesn’t make it good or bad!  Garlic is just garlic.  We take it or leave it.   I used to say this, but I still judged people and things – we do it automatically.  But we don’t use the word “judgement” .  We don’t admit that we passed a judgement.  We say we “expressed our opinion” .

For many people we unconsciously pass judgements thousands of times every day – everything and everyone we see.  Watch yourself – see if you can catch yourself “having an opinion/thought” about the people you pass in the street, the neighbours, the news, even when you watch a film you take some character’s side, one guy you want to win and the other you want him dead – because he is the bad guy.

If you experiment with this, you may be surprised.  If you practice stopping the judgements you will definitely feel much lighter inside.

During COVID-19, wasn’t it really difficult not to form opinions on so many subjects?  Did you make decisions or come to conclusions on

  • how the virus started – WHO was responsible?
  • whether we should have lockdown or be free to do as we like?
  • whether we should all be wearing masks or not?
  • whether lockdown should end sooner or later?
  • whether our kids should go back to school now or when?
  • if you never had an opinion on Donald Trump before, do you have one now?
  • whether the government handled the situation in a good way or a bad way?
  • as you scrolled through instagram did you have fleeting opinions on this one’s video or the fact that one put on make-up or not?

They are just the general ones – there are thousands of other things we all think about all day long and judge.

Personal opinion, quiet judgements, whatever, we might think is ok and not damaging to anyone.  Oh but it is damaging.

Firstly it can be very damaging for our own health.  We can look at something and appreciate it – that’s beneficial.

But if we look at something and decide in the negative, it rarely stops there.   At some point we can be driven to making a negative comment (to say the least) and before you know it, we are in the middle of a full blown facebook or twitter argument.  Our stress levels soar, cortisol courses through our blood, if the argument gets really bad…..friends and family fall out and even “unfriend” one another.

This morning Dr. Ben’s video on shaming someone because they are not an expert popped up in my facebook stream and I started to write a quick comment on it.  At some stage the comment became too long and ended up here in this post and the other post is COVID-19 A Lesson from the Universe on the Nature of Reality.

Shaming and blaming affects other people very badly – it damages them more than we realise, it hurts them.  But when we do it, we ourselves are the biggest losers – it affects our health, our minds and our immune systems.