Tag Archives: silver lining

Shit Happens – what to do

“Everything, without exception, that happens me is for my good”  is a belief I have been cultivating since about 2000 when I first read Louise Hay’s book “You Can Heal Your Life”.

Usually it is when I am experiencing a set-back, disappointment or an apparent disaster that I work on making this belief stronger.  It means that when disaster or disappointment strikes I try to remember that since absolutely everything is for my good, my ultimate and highest good, it will serve me better to accept instead of resent the situation.

This is not easy as of course, I have emotions and all the natural reactions any person has.  But I try to switch my focus, not talk about it and find something else to occupy my mind – in those situations I play a LOT of Su Doku!

When shit happens I now practice:

  1. Remind myself “I did this, I created this!”
  2. Remind myself “And I can bloody well fix it!”
  3. Not lose my head too much in the moment, not go into a spiral of blame, resentment, anger, depression or frustration
  4. Not lash out in anger at my nearest and dearest
  5. Remind myself to keep a look out now for the benefit from this shitty thing that just happened.
  6. Watch CAREFULLY for something great that is happening BECAUSE of the shitty thing.  It will be something that could not have happened WITHOUT the shitty thing.
  7. Remind myself of all the times this has happened me before.  All the times good came from bad.  Keep watching out for the miracle regardless of time – it might not be today it happens.
  8. But it will happen – IF I am watching out for and expecting it.  IF I switch my focus from the shitty thing to the expected happy surprise now that there is nothing to be done about the shit.

If you want to try this just take some time to sit down with a pen and paper.  Look back over your life and find happy events that you now know would not have happened only for some connected disaster having happened you some time before.

By the way, sometimes it might be only a few hours between the disappointment and the miracle – but sometimes it can be weeks, months and even years – but there is always a connection, you just have to look hard enough to find it.

PERSONAL EXAMPLE – A recent and quite substantial miracle for me and my son, Stephen.  It began with the apparent disaster and disappointment when we were all set to buy a beautiful old building in Cairo – perfect for a boutique hotel.

Everything seemed right about it.  The building was beautiful outside and needed just a little love and care to make it shine again.  The location was perfect.  The price was right  The timing SEEMED right and we had other investors.

Then the week before we were to close the sale, one of our investors had to pull out due to the Irish economic worsening situation.  It was a BIG disappointment.  HOWEVER, 6 months later, it was 25 Jan 2011 and Egypt was at the beginning of a long and debilitating revolution – which was about to wipe out  the Egyptian tourism industry.  THERE was our miracle, there was our silver lining.

Had we completed the sale, by the time the revolution hit we would have spent most of the money needed and had a unique but completely empty boutique hotel.

Where Am I Today – 2013 Oct 20?

The ongoing situation in Egypt has had me in an up and down, up and down financial position since 2011.  Until early 2013 when, to a greater extent, the tourism industry flat-lined completely.  Keeping my balance has not been easy.

My worst moments have been those when I struggled against the situation; those days and nights when I sat dreaming up ways to encourage tourists back, dreaming of bringing the kind of community schemes to Egypt that helped us progress in Ireland during economic difficulties.  The frustration in the knowing there was no reason for us not having tourists; – reality that can be seen with hindsight.  Luxor has been uneventful apart from an odd incident here and there, but no tourists ever involved – apart from the balloon crash and that could happen anywhere.

But for every night of despair and every disappointment I can point to an awakening, a realization.  I have progressed enormously towards happiness and understanding that I create my own reality, regardless of circumstances around me.

I have discovered and polished up more than one hidden talent.  So while I am still waiting for the financial recovery and miracle, at least once a day I raise my eyes to heaven and say “Come on God – where is it?  It’s been a while now and I’m ready, very ready for my ‘only for the revolution miracle’!  That is not a cry of despair – that is me letting God/Universe know I am ready and looking for signs to encourage my belief.

To end my story for today – let me just say that over the last 6 days I have thanked God/Universe daily for closing some doors for me.

Let’s just say I know now I have been saved from the jaws of hell and my feet are set firmly on a better path – with a better attitude and renewed faith that absolutely every single thing that happens is for my ultimate good!

When shit happens – keep your head and be on the look out for the resulting miracle, the silver lining that would now be, without the shit that flew my way.

Shit Happened (Literally!) – what did i do?

4 a.m. I fly into Cairo, hop in a taxi and 30 mins. later I’m letting myself into my apt. – “Home at last, cup of choc and I’m off to bed!” says I to myself……..well, uh…nooo!  What is that smell?  I drop my bags and follow my nose……”WTF?!”

Before my astonished eyes – my parquet floor down the entire length of the corridor is a topsy-turvey, higgledy-piggledy mess, 2 – 3 inches off the floor.  Being used to Irish winters, my first thought was “Burst Pipes!”  Wait, no, can’t be – this is Egypt, no pipes under my floor…..look upwards, no water on the ceiling.  I get to the bathroom door and see the floor is covered in mud.  How? From where?  What the????

First photo below is the hall and corridor before the toilet eruption – parquet was unusable again so we had to tile it.  In the second photo, the “bibet” is the small, square, shiny metal object in front of the shower.  That is where the “eruption” happened.  Unbelieveable that such a small opening could spew up enough dirt and water to cover the entire floor and the adjoining corridor!

It took me a few minutes to understand that the bibet (hole in the bathroom floor where the water goes down) had somehow erupted, spewing water everywhere.  Forget going to bed! I get out the hose, mop and bucket and automatically started cleaning.

At 6am I find the caretaker, call the plumber and so begins a saga that lasts until mid-day as the investigation proceeds – the end of the story?  It wasn’t my fault apparently, nothing at all to do with me, apart from destroying my floor.  Old pipes outside the building…never mind, I doubt I can explain it properly.

Is the problem fixed?  Will it happen again?  Who knows?  You see – this is Egypt and even the bibets are in revolt!  Thank God it wasn’t the toilet!!!!  Don’t laugh – that can erupt also!

Moral of the story?  Don’t sit on the toilet too long in Egypt….remember Mel Gibson and (was it Danny Glover?) in what was the name of that movie?  Lethal Weapon?

I found out a few things today.  What was the worst part of the day?  Was it the mess? the shock? the expense of replacing the entire floor?  No, it was the hours of frustration trying to communicate with 4 Egyptian men.  They were all experts, of course.  Trying to communicate that whatever about the problem inside my apt. there was no way I was paying for whatever it was that caused the problem outside – actually it was worse than that.

I could see what and where the problem was, but they were so busy trying to ensure I took ownership of the entire problem they refused to really listen and try to see the cause of the problem.  After all they were men, weren’t they?  This was their domain and what the hell would a woman know anything about it?  So that was the first thing I discovered – the frustrated communication was what got to me the most.  BUT, if I were not imbued with self-doubt and certainly, giving off a vibe of uncertainty, which they naturally and automatically interpreted – would my communications with them have been easier?  I’m sure it would.

What else did I find out?  I discovered that something had shifted in my consciousness.  In the midst of the arguments about fixing the situation and who was responsible, I realised I was actually extremely upset, a bit shocked, extremely tired, and about to burst into tears.  I did shed a few before I could stop them.  I always wonder why I can’t look as good as Demi Moore in “Ghost” – I look nothing like that when the tears are streaming down my face!

Wiping away the sweat (35 degrees here today) and the tears, I suddenly stopped short.  I don’t know where it came from – but across my mind rushed the thoughts “What the hell is wrong with you?  Look at the state of you over some water, timber and bit of work!  Who cares?  What other troubles have you?  If that is the worst you have to worry about – then you are one luck B*****”.

As if suddenly struck by lightening, I felt so lucky!  I thought of my family – all fine TG!  What else is important?  Who cares about the rest of it?  I am thankful, really, I am for that erupted bibet for bringing me that appreciation.

Comparing myself to others in order to make myself feel good never worked for me.  You know like when your parents told you how lucky you were to have that dinner that you didn’t want to eat, while others were starving?  My inward response was usually “well, you send it to them!  I don’t want it!”

It’s the same thing, in a way, but worlds apart in the feeling of it.  For anyone who can understand what I mean by that.  I’ve been teaching my grand-daughter to practice waiting when something crappy happens, if you can, and look for the “silver lining” but this is probably the first time I’ve been aware of a wonderful positive feeling of SATISFACTION right in the middle of a crappy situation. I guess practice makes perfect.

I have a lot to be satisfied with and that is where my focus should be, not on one silly event which will be sorted in a couple of days!

Two other things…

  1. I have to admit being vibrationally responsible for this mishap – I created this – and I am not going to back to dig out exactly where it started.  It’s enough for me to know it.
  2. It could have been worse – I could have been sitting on the toilet or in the shower when it happened LOL!

No, I am quite sure I haven’t turned into PollyAnna YET …. but I am thankful for the feeling of her today!  It’s now 8pm and I’m having that cuppa choc and getting to bed!  YEAH!